Aunty Avis!

I am not a very good blogger.
I'm not a very good anything.
Oh dear, HEEEELP MEEEE.
What do I do? What do I do?
Erghhhhh.
I feel like my old Great Aunty Avis.
R.I.P.
I do have some funny ass stories about Avis. Once... she ate some cigarette butts thinking they were peanuts "These are very nice Gerry, did you roast them yourself?" and when her electric blanket caught on fire and she thought that's how they kept you warm. so she just sat there on fire until the fire engines came.
she stole my Beano every year. She'd take all my Christmas presents and wouldn't give them back until the end of the night when she'd fallen asleep and poured whisky down herself.
She walk through the door every year and say to both my brothers and myself: "Ohhhh! Haven't you all grown like a palm tree!" In her Indian accent. Her husband was called Frank.... hence my middle name 'Francis' and my middle name on facebook :)
She died a few years ago. I can't remember how she died... I think just her old age of 93... but I do have a few funny imaginary deaths, which sounds sick, I know, but here they are:

1. She got beaten to death by teenagers after she kicked one in the balls.
2. She got eaten by pigeons
3. She crashed in to a tree on her motorbike.
4. she tried the electric blanket again and this time the fire engine's didn't come.
5. she chokced on cigarette butts and whisky.

But enough of poor Aunty Avis dying.
But I think I will do some more funny family blog posts.
Tune in sometime in the future for crazy Aunty Alex.