Proper 'eartspill roight 'ere.

Yep,
Which is probably why I liked you
You turned me around in to someone new.
You should feel responsible for my life
My whole life and personality is because of you
I am where I am because of you.

Hey,
Old feelings never die right?
I should have never put up a fight, right? For years.
Do you honestly have no brains to comprehend that maybe... just maybe.. that if you were worth fighting for, crying for, lying for, or breaking for, that maybe I was lying to break through and crying because I don't like fighting?

Love = Hate

Just take me back to the start? Please. Please?
Also, stop giving me dirty looks because you're scared I'm going to rape you, I don't love you. I just don't want you to be with anyone else because I am jealous that I never had that.

Love = Jealousy

We went through a phase of talking again, now it's just reached the point where it's awkward again, like it was in year 8
Me:"Iyt"
You:"Yh U?"
Me:"Yh Iyt."
You:"Kl wuu2?"
Me:"(Thinking about you) Nmmm, u?"
You:"(Thinking about someone other than you) sme."
Me:"(If only you were thinking about me too.)
You:"(If only he was thinking about someone else)

Love = Awkwardness

At the moment I'm either a blank page, or the piece of paper you doodled on in English so so much that there's no space left for anything else.

Love = Kittens.

O HAI BLOGGER.

I'm actually hating on how Parmiters is so attractive. It's like all the attractive kids from primary school went to Parmiters. I'm not being a bumlick, but I would actually date the whole school.
This morning I woke up crying, well with tears in my eyes and my face all red and puffy and tears on the pillow. I slept cried for the first time, I didn't know it was possible. I had such a realistic dream, I won't carry on but something happened to a friend of mine and I was absolutely distraught. I also woke up with the covers perfect folded down to my hips and all of my pillows in a perfect line along my body and my phone in my hand, I was actually quite scared if I am honest, I thought what the hell have I been doing :|
But yeah, it was a really weird experience it, I kind of half wasn't expecting to see Regan (the girl in my dream) at school today. I'm so glad I don't believe in dreams meaning stuff, because if this meant something, I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if something happened to her.
Molly's party was so so good, although I stunk of Peach Schnapps the whole day after, I met Alexander Evans, Amy Garrett, Adam Phipps(Properly) and I think that's the whole 'A' department. They're all lovely :)
Helen has Godspell on thursday, friday and saturday. I'm going to see it on thursday. Thursday is 10 minutes away and I'm going with Toni, I'm really excited.
On friday I'm going to the barn to see Jamie Forester and Jamie Rodwell play, it's going to be packed solid! Then on saturday night, I'm going out for dinner for Mairead and Rachel's birthday which should be nice :)
My saturdays have been packed with birthdays and I think I may have spotted some tumbleweed in my wallet. Erm... Erm.. Erm... I think I have a virus on here too, which is annoying. My next blog post should be... soon... but to be honest, I have to be in the mood. Possibly sunday? I love you all blog readers!

Burp.

Oh Daniel, girls can be so hard sometimes. I do feel for him. Some girls have no idea that once a boy falls in love, their heart is in their hand and most of the time they tend to kick it around a bit, play with it, before finally squishing it. There is nothing fun about a crushed heart.
Crushed for 4 years.

I don't know whether it's because it's way too hot in my room to be comfortable, or just this feeling that's still there.

Friends will do! :)
I probably wouldn't have been good enough anyway.
At least I can be completely comfortable with you anyway, now :)
I haven't writen a blog in ages, I've been down.
I don't understand why you're number one (8) WHY DO I HAVE DAPPY IN MY HEAD.
Ball of confusion (8) Oh oh ohhhhh yeah! BALL OF CONFUSION!

I'm upset tonight, why can't I ever fulfil my needs?
My brother does no fucking work in this house. I know I need to stop whining and feeling sorry for myself but I feel so frustrated tonight.
It has just occured to me properly that you know I like you but yet you haven't said anything yet which probably means that you do think I'm a creep. Erghh, I don't know why I like you, I don't really know you. You don't know me, nobody knows either of us. Not really, anyway.
But then again, I can't really speak for you. I feel like I've burst through the comfort zone with everyone except you, why is it so hard? Whywhywhywhywhy? Please tell me.
Ed's party last nice was very nice! I was a pirate!
We were also very entertained by Helen's rendition of 'Uptown Girl' but most people decided that cake was better and escaped. I bummed Katie, not literally of course, it was just awkward and we were in fits.

You sad. :(

Lauryn Hill is so amazing, even though she apparently hates white people, I don't care, her music is blooming amazing and she's absolutely beautiful!
Please pick up a bit, I don't want to see you sad.

Monk flops.

Gots to get rid of my little belly that McDonalds has given me.
I also wish that my stepdad won't insist on putting the noisiest kettle in the world on when I'm just about to watch Celebrity Big Brother, yes I know, I'm guilty of watching 'that crap', it's a guilty pleasure I must admit.
I don't want to scare you away. Don't let me scare you away.

Mini Beaver.

I don't want to bother you, and scare you away, so I just write little messages to you that you'll never see.

Britt Love from Mini Viva knows who we are! I hope Frankee does too, she's penggggg.
Yeah BRitt Love posted Helen and I's cover on her twitter and said "Aww Sweet" And I haven't been able to shut up about it :P
I'm so excited, I really want to meet her now. I especially want to meet Frankee Connolly (L) SHE HOTTTT.
I've also finished 'Caught' I quite like it, trying to not sound big headed here is failing, but it's probably my most emotional song.

Late night messages

I'm sorry I didn't mean to put you on the spot. You made me happy, please don't feel guilty.

Zahra and Janelle were trying to make me angry last night and decided to text me lots and lots and Janelle actually called me at one point.

Snowpenis.

Remind me not to do my lion impression next time. Please :).

I had a very nice day today, I went out with Jan, Sarah, Alice, Nabi, Nem, Jo and Rachel.
Very pretty. The snow was aswell.
We built a snowman ( I accidentally just typed 'killed' and now I'm laughing :D) well all we did was put two already made balls of snow on top of eachother then couldn't be bothered to make a head as the snow was too crumbly so we put a little lump of snow on top and then Rachel knocked a big hole in it's... neck? So it looked like it had a shelf.
Then Nabi took down Jan which was hilarious and Jan took down Sarah aswell.
Then Sarah, Jan and I went to mcdonalds where I taught them how to eat big mac's and Jan thought I was teaching her how to rape!
I'm writing a new song at the moment it needs a name... It's nearly finished. The name's are either 'Skeleton', 'Caught' or something else interesting. It's Jo's birthday tomorrow so Helen's comign round to mine and then we're walking up to Parmiter's which should be super great.


I think I'll get to know her better before it's just the two of us. Now i have 'Just the two of us' in my head, and I hope you do aswell Nem.

Lips please.

I sleep with three pillows and I sleep on two, I swap the bottom one to the top and then I swap the top one with the one on the side, just incase they get lonely.

I want lipssssss. Not more of my own ones but somebody elses.
I've also lost my capo in my bedroom heap, I'll find it in like 15 minutes by treading on it, I bet!
I just want lips that want my lips, that sounds very creepy and creepy boyish, but I actually don't really understand it myself. Ergh.

I don't know why I decided to make the girl a cat. It was instincitive I suppose.
I'm sorry I left it too late,
I guess I was too nervous of what you'd say.
Of what everyone else would say. Sorry.

"You're too young."

PLAY THE SONG WHILE READING! :)

I'm in a spiritual mood today, I've had two epiphanies in the last couple of days. One is who I really am and one is that I shouldn't be afraid to show it.

I'm going to tell you a quick story of a boy who didn''t have a name, sometimes he felt like Solan and sometimes he felt like Gallard.
Some days he'd wake up and think I cannot believe I felt like Gallard yesterday, that's sickening, others; he'll think he was crazy for thinking he was Solan.
Little did the boy know that he was really neither Gallard nor Solan but someone completely different that didn't have to have a name.



So the boy with no name decided to do everything that he had never done before and decided to make the most of his life, because who cares what people's opinions are whether you're Gallard or Solan, you will find yourself one day whether it be Gallard or Solan or anything you want it to be because being who you really are can lead you to do a lot more stuff than keeping it a secret.

Hmm, my music journalism has taken a good turn as I've had a few ideas from Helen and her mother, possibly review some local bands...
then I could get them to like me, and then once I get more bands to like me.. I get offered a job in a magazine and maybe get free tickeets to their gigs? :)